Biochemistry Makes My Brain Cry.

And now I have to take the exam...wish me luck!

Dreams &Things

It's really quite ridiculous the dreams I've been having lately. They're so vivid, and lifelike, but at the same time absolutely INSANE. I don't know what's going on in my head, but in these dreams so many people die and it's starting to get depressing. I wish I could describe the one I had last night because it was ridiculous, but I do remember the ending.

Someone was coming either to kill us or take us away or burn our house down with us inside...or something. And I'm freaking out and my mom is upstairs huddled on this couch we have in the hallway. I curl up with her because we're so afraid. All of a sudden the doorbell rings and it's my dad, accompanied by "The Beatles." Now it's not really the Beatles...because for one Morgan Freeman was George. Anyway, they check our house for bugs and everything, but everything seems fine.

This is all I remember really distinctly, but a whole bunch of shit happened that I can't even explain that I can see going on in my head. The dream I had two nights ago was just downright scary...there were people cutting themselves and getting lost in some ice cave place....just weird shit. Like I said, I have no idea what's going on in my head but it's getting really weird.

Anyway, it's hump day in the middle of my third week back at college. I should be doing laundry right now, but apparently 9:00 on a Wednesday morning is prime time to do laundry so I haven't gotten a chance yet. Academically, school's been pretty okay. I kind of feel like a slacker because at the moment I'm only taking three classes--Biochemistry, Genetics, and a Crusades class--but, seriously? It's Biochem and Genetics. Two of the hardest classes in the Bio department. Nonetheless, I still feel like a little bit of a slacker. I think it's because the work really hasn't started to pick up yet and I've been able to get it done quickly. I do have my first Genetics exam coming up and a paper in the Crusades class due next week, so there's that. Socially, school's been wonderful. I've been getting off campus to do work with my lovely friends...coughspendingtoomuchmoneycough...and driving my cute little car places. Nick visited last week and we had a GREAT fun night playing scrabble with some really awesome chicas ;]. I hope that happens more often because it really was a lot of fun. I'm going back to visit him this Friday and hopefully seeing my baby horsie on Saturday.

So life's pretty good. Fencing's a pain in the ass, but that's a whole other story. Now I need to print out some readings for next week [to have something to do on my Stephanie&Alyssa Wednesday] and hopefully do laundry! Grr...

ciao!

EDIT: iTunes just made me this GENIUS GENIUS playlist. It's amazing. It kind of puts me to shame....

1. Re: Stacks - Bon Iver
2. White Winter Hymnal - Fleet Foxes
3. Fake Empire - The National
4. Boy With A Coin - Iron & Wine
5. Casimir Pulaski Day - Sufjan Stevens
6. Postcards from Italy - Beirut
7. Imitosis - Andrew Bird
8. Keep the Car Running - The Arcade Fire
9. In the Aeroplane Over the Sea - Neutral Milk Hotel
10. The Park - Feist
11. Naked As We Came - Iron & wine
12. The Crane Wife 3 - The Decemberists
13. Flume - Bon Iver
14. The Dress Looks Nice on You - Sufjan Stevens
15. Oxford Comma - Vampire Weekend
16. No Cars Go - Arcade Fire
17. Mistaken For Strangers - The National
18. Oh No - Andrew Bird
19. Pagan Angel and A Borrowed Car - Iron & Wine
20. Scenic World - Beirut
21. Sleeping Lessons - The Shins
22. Anthems For A Seventeen-Year-Old Girl - Broken Social Scene
23. The Well And The Lighthouse - The Arcade Fire
24. Blindsided - Bon Iver
25. Plasticities - Andrew Bird

<3

Oh, the Problems I Have...

I'm pretty sure it's about time I blogged again. I've been so busy it just hasn't been able to happen, which is sad. But my day from hell is over and even though it produced more thoughts of hell I don't actually have to think about them for a while. Though I'll probably vent about them on here.

So, things to look forward to:
1. Only 3 days of classes left in the semester!
2. Seeing my boo on Friday.
3. Phillies game on Saturday [thank you SO much Stephanie].
4. MAY DAY.
5. Phillies game next Saturday with the boo. <3
6. GOING HOME SO SO SOON! =D

And things still left to accomplish:
1. Summary Paper for Mad Cow Disease presentation [which is almost done!].
2. Meeting with Prof Truitt about final revision paper on Friday.
3. THREE MORE DAYS OF CLASS.
4. Self-scheduled final Chemistry exam.
5. Take-home Anthropology exam [due May 11].
6. Final 8-9 page revision/extension/crazy-ass reworking paper [due May 7].
7. I'd also like to send some letters to friends, but I'm not sure if that's going to happen.

So the day from hell:
Well, I had to take my microbiology exam last night. I took it from 1 to 4 in the morning. Which, retrospectively, probably wasn't the best idea, but I needed to get it done and I didn't really feel like I could prepare any more for it so I just took it. IT WAS AWFUL. And that's all I'll say about that. Then I needed to prepare for my mad cow presentation, which absolutely took FOREVER because I could not get it down to 8 minutes. I just had way too much information to fit into an 8 minute talk [I'm even having trouble now summarizing my poster into a 2 page paper! AH!]. So I was up really late trying to cut down the presentation. I ended up only getting 1 1/2 hours of sleep, maybe even less because I just kind of lay there for a while trying to think of how to cut down my presentation more. Then I woke up, took a shower, and ran through my presentation a couple of times, still trying to cut it down but could only get it to 9-10 minutes. Went to class. Didn't get to finish. I ran over time. It was so embarrassing. I was so nervous about this presentation, I was sweating up a storm. And I didn't even get to talk about my final topic at all. Not to mention the fact that my Prof scared me shitless and kind of made me feel really stupid...when I was hanging up my poster she said to me, "You haven't taken Orgo yet have you?" And I was like, "No, but I'm taking it this summer in a two month intensive course." And she goes, "Well, you realize you need Orgo for Biochem right? And Biochem is a lot of work. People think that they can breeze through the prerequisites to get to Biochem and then find they aren't ready." And that just left me shocked. I don't know. I like this professor a lot, but I can't stop thinking about how much that kind of hurt. I realize [with help from Joanna] that she is probably just looking out for me because Organic Chemistry is a hard course and the kind of course that will prepare you for the intense course that is Biochemistry, but I couldn't help but think that she thought I couldn't handle it. So that's part 1 of my problems.
Part 2 comes in when Joanna and I go back to her room before going to lunch. I signed up to potentially be a Bio lab TA next year, because number 1...I need a job, and number 2, I feel like it would look really good on a resume to actually have a job on campus that deals with my major. The problem rears its ugly head when Joanna finds that we got an email from the lab professor telling us to give our preferences for lab days. Of course there were a bunch of returning TAs so there was no guarantee we would get a spot, but we should put our time preferences down anyway. The lab times are Monday 1-4, Tuesday 10-1, and Tuesday 1:30-4:30, and Wednesday 1-4. I can't do ANY of those times with the schedule that I prepared for myself for next semester. Monday and Wednesday I have a History class that I am DYING to take from 2:30-4. I'm halfway towards a History minor and this is a 100-level course which I need, taught by my favorite professor. I feel like it would be a waste to not take the class. And on Tuesday I have Biochem [I mean we'll see if I even get in anymore] from 10-11:30 and the Biochem lab form 1-4. I had thought there would be a Thursday Intro Bio lab and that's when I could TA. I'm so depressed. I can't believe that I assumed that. UGH. Here comes part 3.
So, in thinking about the Organic Chemistry and Biochemistry dilemma, I realized that the higher level Biology classes I applied for at Haverford both require Organic Chemistry as a pre-requisite. Meaning I'll probably be lotteried out of the classes because I don't have the pre-requisite. So now I have to email the professors and basically beg to be let in. I don't know what I'm going to do if I don't get anything. It will basically have been pointless to have taken Organic Chemistry over the summer because if I don't get into any of those classes I might as well take Organic Chemistry at Bryn Mawr next year because I'll only have a history class in my schedule. UGH I HATE MY LIFE. Today was supposed to be a big relief and an amazing day because my presentations that I was uber scared for would be done and I only had this summary paper for Microbio due on Friday and then it would be an amazing weekend and then all I would have to do would be to survive finals week. But no. All of these things had to come into my head and make me even more depressed.
I just don't know what to do. I mean I know I really should email those professors for the Haverford classes, but other than that I guess I really can't do anything until the lottery results come out. It's just going to be even more nerve-wracking than usual. I can't believe how screwed I got in the way of classes at this school. And people wonder why I stress about choosing classes so much. It's because I have no effing luck at all.

Okay. I think that's enough venting. I need to finish this summary paper, which is now approaching 4 pages and is only supposed to be 2. Sigh. I guess I should try to look at the bright side: this weekend is going to be amazing. And I'm not going to think about work at all. Friday = Boo. Saturday = Phillies. Sunday = MAY DAY. And it's going to be a great one.

HAVE I MENTIONED THE WEATHER IS GORGEOUS?! It's made me really happy and has tried to improve my mood and did for a while until today. And sadly tomorrow it's going to be cold and rainy...very exemplary of my mood, but c'est la vie. What a long post. Also, I took that picture. =]

ciao!

Sleepless.

So far this week I haven't gone to bed earlier than 4 in the morning.

Why can't I sleep?

Why is there so much work I have to do?


UGH.

ciao.

New Layout on Life.

So here's a new layout. Well, just new colors really. I didn't feel like trying to find a fancy pretty layout like Jen's.

I'm way sorry for not blogging, but in response to my last post I did actually do a lot of things that I wanted. Let's see..

1. I want to go home. [check!]
2. I want to read at least ten books. [oops...didn't even get through one. sad...]
3. I want to relax and sleep. [CHECK!]
4. I want to spend time with my boyfriend. [check check check!!]
5. I want to visit and kiss and love my horse. [sadly no. i didn't get to see him which makes me really sad].
6. I want to visit Jen and Gillian. [check! i visited Jen hurray!]
7. I want to drive around in Hermes. [CHECK!]
8. I want to cuddle by the fireplace. [well...no.]
9. I want to play my guitar. [fail.]
10. I want to FEEL BETTER. [can I give half a check? I feel better, but I'm definitely still sick. yuck.]
11. I want warm weather. [well this was out of my control, but there were a couple of nice warm days.]
12. I want to drive around with the windows down and the sunroof open. [CHECK! it made me so so happy.]
13. I want springtime and flowers and green leaves. [again, out of my control. so no.]
14. I WANT TO GO HOME AND SEE MY WONDERFUL PARENTS SO THEY CAN TAKE CARE OF ME AND I CAN FEEL LOVED. [CHECK!]


So all in all. It wasn't a bad break. I didn't get TONS of homework done. But as I always feel, break is a time to relax. And I definitely did that. Anyway let's try to recap what I did this break so maybe I'll feel a bit accomplished. I went to work with my grandfather Monday and Wednesday, which was good because I got to get paid! Which in my current situation is always a good thing. Tuesday I went to the dentist [ick] and then drove to Bryn Mawr to spend time with Jen and Anna, which was really nice. The drive wasn't bad at all, I'm looking forward to hopefully doing it more often and hopefully having Hermes there next year! I went to Chipotle for the first time and it was absolutely DELISH. I'll be heading there with Jen again sometime I think. =] Thursday I went to work with my momma and did some filing and shredding for her, no money but she bought me a pretty shirt and flip flops later. We went out to dinner with Nick's sister at Bertucci's which was yummy yummy. Then Nick came over later that night and spent the night. Friday was a lazy day with my boo. We played Rock Band all morning then went out to lunch. We came back and watched the creepiest movie ever with my mom [Sibyll...shiver]. My dad made us chili for dinner. Boo and I watched TV with my mom then he had to go home. Sad. Saturday was pretty lazy as well. I watched movies with my dad/ did homework. Then I drove up to Cherry Hill to go see Watchmen with Nick, and his friend and his friend's girlfriend. It was a really good movie. Way too long probably, and I'm definitely going to have to see it again to fully understand it. Went to UNO's for dinner at 11:30 haha. Then drove home. And now it's Sunday. And I'm trying to get homework accomplished. I'm almost done my chemistry homework. Then I really have to do some reading and PACK. uck. I don't really want to go back to Bryn Mawr because I'm just really worried about classes this semester. But I know I have to buckle down and get things done. I have to keep encouraging myself and hopefully try to do as well as possible.

As far as the no spending thing for Lent goes...I've only spent money on food. And the toll to go to Bryn Mawr. That's good right? Haha, but things are OH SO TEMPTING. But I shall persevere!

I guess I should go back tot hat homework. Le sigh.

Home again?

I'm back at Bryn Mawr.

While nothing can replace home, I feel almost as if I've never left Bryn Mawr. Sure, it's taking me a while to get back into the swing of classes and such, but I moved in and have been sleeping fairly well and everything's been pretty okay. I've been to and got into all of the classes I'm going to take this semester which is a huge relief and I think I'm going to be pretty happy with it. My schedule is also really nice.

Monday: Intro to Cultural Anthropology-- 10:00-11:30

General Chemistry-- 12:00-1:00

Tuesday: Microbiology -- 10:00-11:30

 Chemistry Lab-- 1:00-4:00

Wednesday: Intro to Cultural Anthropology-- 10:00-11:30

             General Chemistry-- 12:00-1:00

Thursday: Microbiology-- 10:00-11:30

      Medieval Medicine-- 1:00-4:00

Friday: General Chemistry-- 12:00-2:00

So all in all I love it. I go to Starbucks with Stafshar Mondays and Wednesdays to do work and chill. Tuesdays and Thursdays I have my fencing. And starting Fridays at noon? What could be better. =] I'm really excited for Microbio and the Medieval Medicine. I'm actually really intimidated by both, especially because I'm expected to participate a lot in both, but hopefully I'll be able to do it. I did really well last semester and I'm hoping to continue that.

In other news, my room is a mess already. I still haven't finished unpacking all of my little shits so I have a big box in the middle of my room overflowing with STUFF. And I [shamefully] bought more posters that I need to hang up, plus I need to rehang the posters that fell down over break. I am proud of myself though because I found out how to work my iHome. HURRAY!

In other other news I actually read three books over break that will begin my 2009 book list/yearly page count! Remember bolded means favorite, * means already read [thought that won't happen too often because I have so many new books to read!]

1. Dragonhaven--Robin McKinley : 342 pages.

2. The Graveyard Book--Neil Gaiman : 307 pages.

3. City of Bones--Cassandra Clare : 496 pages.

Total = 1,145 pages.

I'm also in the middle of about four books that I hope to finish soon before classes get totally CRAZY.

I guess that's all for now. I'm going to try to blog more often because I really do like doing it. It lets me think and let out  stuff that I don't really say that much. Time to read about microbial cell function and structure!

ciao!

Oh What to Do!

I have SO MUCH to do! So, here's a to do list for now:

1. [X] finish correcting french paper.

2. [X] go to gym with Anna, Chelsea, & Jackie.

3. [ ] put up Christmas lights in room.

4. [ ] clean room.

5. [ ] send Christmas cards. 

6. [ ] french homework.

7. [ ] study bio.

8. [ ] study french.

9. [ ] study calc.

10. [ ] calc homework?

11. [ ] watch Hedwig for CSEM performance.

12. [ ] CSEM final paper.

13. [X] knit. =]

okay there's probably more and probably more things that are a lot more important than some of the things listed above but that's okay. 

Edits in bold. =]